Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Gems in View

Look up
Look out
Make up
Make out

See you
Need you
Treat me
Right me

Guess who
Dress who
Who knew
You knew

Chase some
Taste some
Bake one
Take one

Swing up
Bling up
Walk away
Talk away

I had a birthday, barely better than boring but, that's about all I can handle these days. Besides my bunny "Anouk", I also lost both our family dogs. Two sister Akitas that have never been apart after 14 years. The smaller, darker, sweeter one,"Kiwi" past fast, and on her own terms, checked out. The other, my big alpha female "Kuma", so strong and stubborn, just could not find her way out of this world with out help.

I was pulled out of bed the other day, and was told what my job would be for the day.
I got all dressed in my best, put a work bag together, and headed out the door.
I dragged that big stubborn Akita out from the cold, hard, wet floor of the garage, and placed her in the hot sun. I found a rock and crushed pills on the corner edge of the concrete steps and laced her lips with the crumbs. I hosed her down, scrubbed her raw, took a pile of towels to her wet wool, brushed her rough, pulling piles of fur, torched her with the blow dryer, and anointed her with oils. And administered another round of relief pills, covered her worried eyes, so we could both rest just a little.

My mantra, repeating both load and low, re-telling her all day...
"No where else I'd rather be, than here with you, Kuma.
Nothing else I would care to do, than this for you, Kuma."

And then finally made the trek to the Vet, in the back of my hatch back Mini Cooper.
Still, while stuck at the street light, she bolts out a cry and a "hang man's kick"!

I had to stop and count how many family and friend pets we have lost just this year, so far, and last. And how many trips have I made over the years, with each one of them in the back of my little "Crack Pipe-Cream Puff-Clown" car.

Life has been a bit messy right about now but, still better than boring.

And, to another "Gem in View": a note to bless our dear blogging friend RENEE of Circling My Head, right out of this world, on her way to her final Graduation day.


Shoes: Sam Edelman


The Style Revolution said...

It F**king sucks losing a pet.

I hope you can enjoy your bday xoxoxo

Mary Jo from TrustYourStyle said...

I love your top photo and words...this makes me so teary--lost a couple of sweet cats like this, it's hard to get over. But so nice to be able to stay with them on their way out. Love to you.



My girlfriend lost both her 14 yr old "Brillo" and 15 year old "Oso", just before mine. Those were her longest relationships in her adult life.

My mother lost her 14 yr old big black fur ball "Sam", in between them.

This little Angel of Mercy gig is ruffling my feathers.

I am good in a crisis.
I dry before, and then after.
In the moment, I know my mission.

It's the after math that takes me off guard. Tripping me up in tears, at the oddest moments.

I don't trust myself outside.

Shadow said...

those little critters climb into our hearts, so subtly and so deeply, and then leave a gaping hole... i'm thinking about you...


My friend Sanae had said...

"Our animal friends leave much bigger holes in our lives than their physical bodies ever did." was this that dropped me to my knees.

Beach Vintage said...

I am so so sorry for this loss you are feeling. I have felt these feelings recently and they suck BIG TIME. Try and have a great weekend and a big Happy Birthday to you love. xx

Kathy said...

I am so sorry. It is so hard. They are so special.

Birthday wishes to you. :)

drollgirl said...

oh girl, i am so sorry, and i am shedding tears for you. i know that doesn't help, but i feel your pain. the furry friends mean so much, and it really hurts when they are gone. hugs, girl. things will get better.

Manon Doyle said... heart breaks for you. I can so relate. I had to put down my Berenese Mountain dog three years ago. I also had my first Boston Terrier at the time and he was not even two. 5 weeks after my Berner went to heaven the Boston swallowed a tiny ball....long story short..... the vet made a medical mistake in surgery. It was the toughest time. I thought I needed to go to pet loss therapy.
My thoughts are with u!!

Happy birthday, my friend!

Angie Muresan said...

I am so sorry for your loss. It really takes everything out of you, doesn't it? Hugs and love your way.

Down and Out Chic said...

reading this sent chills up my back. i'm so sorry for you losses but these animals and people were lucky to have you and you, them. my heart goes out to you and your beautiful words will stick with me today.

Campbell Jane said...

My heart goes out to you at such a difficult time.
Happy Birthday. Wishing you many blessings to come this year.


It's horrible to read about the deaths you've faced recently. I hope the rest of your 2010 turns out to be bright, fun, and full of laughter.

Wishing you all the best,

P.S. - I really dig your writing style

Denise @ Swelle said...

That's so sad, I really feel for you. That's too much in so little time. You're such a sweet soul, lots of love and good thoughts to you. ♥


so sorry dear~
there are time to laugh & there are time to cry under the sun as they say~ thinking of you*


Dustjacket Attic said...

Oh it's hard to say Happy Birthday when you are miserable. So sorry for your loss honey. My pets are members of the family, it hurts so bad when they pass.

Couture Carrie said...

Gorgeous post, darling!
Love those shoes!


Charlotte said...

It just feels so unacceptable to lose a loved one, of any species. I hope your grief is productive, not destructive, easier said than done.

Kathysue said...

So sorry for your loss, it is amazing how we grieve for a pet, it kind of sneaks up on us. They love us so unconditionally and there are not many in life that can do that so freely. It is a great loss when we don't have that in our lives anymore. So sorry,Kathysue